Their always-sold-out workout classes have led to a booming career in the fitness industry—after leaving their job at the popular workout studio SLT, they launched their own workout called be.come, a music-driven pilates-meets-yoga-meets-strength-training workout. But Meyers’ relationship with Younger star Nico Tortorella has also garnered media attention. The duo have been together for 11 years, and they both identify as sexually fluid. And if you ask Bethany to put a label on their sexuality, they’ll tell you labels are complicated. “There’s the way you feel yourself, and then other people’s words and definition to describe how you identify,” they explain. “By definition, I’ve been in love with and slept with both men and women, which is ’technically’ bisexual. I’ve been with Nico for so long that I can’t see myself being with any other man. But I also feel more comfortable with women than men. It’s complicated.” Beyond their sexualities, Meyers and Tortorella have another nontraditional element to their relationship: It’s an open relationship, meaning both are free to date and sleep with other people. “It took us a while to say we were in that place, but people we would date seemed so thrown off by how close we were,” Myers says. “So we finally sat down and said, in a way, it’s almost like we’re husband and wife—so we should present our relationship that way to other people.” Meyers also advises coming up with a specific set of accountability rules to make coping with these feelings easier. “I was with a woman, and we set up some rules just to hold each other accountable. For example, we would set up times to talk, so I would say, ‘OK, I’ll talk to you at nine tonight’ instead of just ‘I’ll talk to you later.’ Ultimately, we want to make each other feel safe.” They also add that for them, transparency is key. “Anything that happens, you know it’s going to happen before it happens. Sleeping with someone shouldn’t be an in-the-moment thing. Then you go back in and say, ‘how did that feel for you?’ it’s a very clear conversation. You have to establish boundaries ahead of time.” Interested in how open relationships work? Here’s the dark side of open relationships no one tells you about.
